Desiring Spiritual Power

Desiring Spiritual Power

For over a year I have been struggling with the debate over a topic of belief in Christian circles about the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. I have heard many convincing arguments as to the existence of such, but never could find their scripture references or personal testimonies to substantiate anything beyond a forceful production or fabrication of what they desired. Even after much discussion with others who at one time were disbelieving in a post-salvation second baptism but after their own personal experience had changed their beliefs, I still could not come to terms with what they saw in Scripture that gave reference to such an event.

I saw and heard so many speak passionately about the power associated with this second baptism, and I did desire to see something different in my own life. What I didn’t realize until mid-February 2010 was that my own pride and the disobedience of my own mind was keeping me from seeing and understanding what I now believe is a very real and very powerful gift from God. I have not yet received this “second baptism,” but my first steps are following the Biblical instructions to “covet the gifts of the Spirit,” and to earnestly desire the power associated with this baptism.

I first felt the desire at work last week. I was having a discussion about Scripture and God’s work in my life with a fellow co-worker, nothing out of the ordinary as we had made this a commonplace topic of conversation, when my boss walked up and begin talking with us about his views. Although he was a professed Christian, I felt many of his viewpoints were very disturbing and a result of an abundant “knowledge” base of worldly things. Too much of the mind and of this world will leave little room for faith. Yet he was sure that he no longer had doubts, although he would make statements similar to “I don’t believe you can take everything in the Bible for what it says.” But what really disturbed me was his lack of belief in Satan, or that God would create a place like Hell for all those that don’t believe in Him. His opinion of such an idea was that if it were true, God is nothing more than a “puppet-master.” I felt the nerves and tension beginning to grow slightly, although it was remaining a very civil conversation. I have never been much to debate or confront a differing view, so I was beginning to be a little intimidated. But I remembered God’s Word in my heart, the same Scriptures I had been receiving from him through my time in study over the past weeks, and even the past couple of days. I felt an empowerment. Not overwhelming, but enough to not back down from my views. I felt a strength to keep talking, even though I know he was disagreeing with me. In the end, I stated my beliefs, based on the truth of God’s Word, and we called it a truce. Even though nothing was really accomplished in the aspect of winning him over or answering his questions, a great victory had been won within me in my relationship with God. I felt His presence in that moment like never before.

After that, I went home and begin reading a chapter on the baptism of the Holy Spirit which I had been putting off doing for over a week. As I read the Scriptures supporting the belief, the light bulb went off and I felt God revealing answers to me that I have been searching for many months to find. I now had the revelation to build my faith, and I now understood what He has been trying to teach me. I want to be confident, unshakeable, in my beliefs, and be able to speak boldly wherever I go as a testimony to His glory, power and grace. I want to win as many as I can to Him, but I know that I never could reach my full potential until I had all of Him inside me. I needed to be baptized into the Spirit. I needed His power. And now my passion for Him is greater than it has ever been. I only pray those things remaining in me that are keeping me from experiencing His power will be revealed to me soon so that I can rid myself of them, allowing Him to fill me with all of Him.